xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xmlns:og="http://ogp.me/ns#" Goes the Distance: Expectives and Perspectation

Friday, November 13, 2009

Expectives and Perspectation

Pretty much been my own Boss all my life.
Did the things I've wanted to do...been the things I've wanted to be....
When I look back....I cherish some of the decisions I've made while regretting a few..

A lot of things that I am and am not are a consequence of my own doing.
As smart as I thought I was...I now realize that I never knew any better....
that what I know and who I am...would only deserve some credit....
in admitting how much more I have to know and how much more I have to be.

Despite having done so much in my life...I realize that in one frame of thought it means everything while meaning nothing in the other.Where I stand and look at myself in the mirror of my mind...
I stand wearing the hat of a fool who's believes he's accomplished something
...... by having proven his worth to a bunch of others.

The others...who will forget..the others...who will detest and the others who will not matter.
I've always known that It'll take a lot for me to figure out who I am.....
Which is why I find it hard to hold on to my heroes,they just don't mean much after a while.
An old friend once suggested the 'The Fountainhead' to put some direction and perspective.
Been resisting it for years...maybe I'll turn it's pages sometime....I don't know.

There are certain things in life that keep me going...
...a sense of ambition..a need to prove myself ( here we go again ! )
...being driven and kept sane by the presence of someone...
whom I've been drawn to since the day I saw her...
the reason I believe in these things so much....
is that they don't disappear and are a part of me in every way.

They transcend time and distance....survive the best and the worst...and continue to lead the way.

The important thing in life is to keep moving.
Stop when you need to figure out directions but don't stop for good.
There's so much out there....it'll shape you in ways you can't imagine.
And if I know any better...you'll never regret it.

I put these words in place to fill the emptiness that I feel right now.
The knowledge that my world as I know it is coming to an Elegant End.
I look back at the years spent in college...
They make me smile with a sense of ownership and accomplishment.

But I look forward and all of that means zilch....
...there's a whole new world that I have to build and I've no clue where to start.

The years before were Bliss !

So what now ?...what do we do ?..I've got things to learn and places to be.
I plan to get to the border but before that...will be going to Kurnool to rebuild some of it.

There's people who are gonna teach me with or without their knowledge....what to do and what not to.

There's a whole world out there that I have to see and will do so....come what may.
There's someone that I want to be and will be ......so come what may...
and in the the process also figure out who I want to be. :-)

Will put myself through the thick and thin of it all and see you on the other side.
There's somewhere I need to start....can't put my finger on it...but who knows....maybe I've started already.

No comments:

Post a Comment